After reading through my blog posts over the last year or so I think I’m finally ready to accept the past and continue my ramblings. I’ve struggled with how to segue between my former married life and my new life. Here Goes:
I was married, thought I had a lifetime commitment, was happy with the imperfections and excited to work on them. That didn’t happen, now I’m getting divorced. Oh Glorious day!
So new life:
I will have primary custody of Nina. (phew!) I’m buying a house in West Seattle, a sweet (like sugar) cottage and will continue with my floral business as well as some other ventures that I will disclose at a later date.
How are things going? Honestly, they are going amazingly well! I’m so happy and relieved to be out of relationship that was not on the level. I feel so free, renewed and alive!
Throughout this drama I have leaned on some amazing people who have been there for me in spades. I was truly shocked and surprised by the huge network of support i have. I actually never realized it was there so this is truly an eye opening experience. Thank you to everyone who has supported me with your time, love, ear and patience. It has truly made all the difference in my ability to thrive so well during this time. I love you all. Extra special thanks to the Kit and the Meyer family. You are all amazing and so loving.
Even though divorce looks like a loss, for me its actually been a gift. I feel truly blessed tot have this opportunity to grow, rethink, and re establish my goals, my true self and realign my life. I have a personal saying though which has helped me manage the past:
As it happens, so it is written.
It means that the past is perfect. It all happens for a reason and the best thing you can do is keep searching for the lessons. This attitude has served me well in making sense of my memories, keeping resentment at bay and trying to forge a new life without regrets. Life truly is beautiful.
Some things have been difficult- communicating with a future ex-husband, getting all the gazillion pieces of the pie together to qualify for a FHA loan- good grief!! But its all coming along.
Establishing my new life is ALL about boundaries. There are so many places in my life that have slippery hinges. I have to be vigilant about how those doors open and who goes through them. So far I feel very strong and determined. I’m remembering once and for all that AP is a viable individual and that I can be self reliant financially, and I can be whole, stand on my two feet and be who I am-without approval. I approve of me and that’s enough! All the help and support is a cherry on top.
That’s said, there are some pretty vital pieces of the puzzle that are coming together-pieces of AP that have been suppressed or denied for too long. That is definitely over. From now on I’m going to live the whole Aimee.
Can’t wait!